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TextATheOffice
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Aliro
(PartI)
[1]ThesolutiontomylifeoeoneeveningwhileIwasironingashirt.Itlebutaudacious.IwentintothelivingroomwheremyhusbandwaswatgtelevisionandIsaid,“IthinkIoughttohaveanoffice.”
[2]Itsouie.WhatdoIwantanofficefor?Ihaveahouse;itispleasantandroomyandhasaviewofthesea;itprovidesappropriateplacesfandsleeping,andhavingbathsaionswithone’sfriends.AlsoIhaveagarden;thereisnolackofspace.
[3]No.Buthereesthedisclosurewhioteasyforme:Iamawriter.Thatdoesnht.Toopresumptuous,phony,oratleastung.Tryagaibetter?Itrytowrite.Thatmakesitworse.Hypocriticalhumility.Wellthen?
[4]Itdoesn’tmatter.HoweverIputit,thewordscreatetheirspaceofsileemomentofexposure.Butpeoplearekind,thesilenceisquicklyabsorbedbythesolicitudeoffriendlyvvariouslyhoodforyou,aisintriguing.Andwhatdoyouwrite?Theyihspirit.Fi,Ireply,bearingmyhumiliationbythistimewithease,eveionofflippancy,whiotalwaysmine,andagain,agaiibleayaresmoothedoutbysuchreadyandtactfulvoices—whichhavehoweverexhaustedtheirstosolatoryphrases,andly,“Ah!”
[5]SothisiswhatIwantanofficefor(Isaidtomyhusband):towritein.Iwasatosoundedlikeafi,apieceofrareself-ie,aseveryoneknowsyouypewriter,oratleastapenepaper,atableandchair;IhaveallthesethingsinanybedrooButnowIwantanofficeaswell.
[6]AndIwashatIwasgoingtowriteinit,ifweedowntothat.MaybeIwouldsitahewall;eventhatprospeotuome.ItwasreallythesoundofthewordsofficethatIliked,itssoundofdignityandpeadpurposefulnessandimportaIdidionthistomyhusband,soIlaueadintoahigh-flowio,asIremember,likethis.
[7]Ahouseisallrightforamantoworkin.Hebringshisworkintothehouse,aplaceisclearedforit;thehesitselfasbestit.Everybhisworkexists.Heisoaelephoofindthingsthatarelost,toseewhytheareg,orfeedtheshuthisdine(Isaid)amherdoor,andtheknowingsheisbehindit;why,theverythoughtofitiseoustotheAwomanwhositsstaringioatrythatisnotherhusband’sorher’sislikewiseknowntobeanature.Soahouseisnotthesameforawomasomeonewhowalksiomakeuseofit,andwillwalkoutagaihehouse;thereisionpossible.
[8]“Goahead,ifyoudoneough,”
isallmyhusbandhadtosay.Heisnotlikeme;hedoesexplanations.Thattheheartofanotherpersonisaethingyouwillhearhimsayfrequently,andwithret.
&henIdidnotthinkitwassomethingthatcouldbeaplished.Perhapsatbottomitseemedtometooimproperawishtobegranted.Ioreeasilyhavewishedforaminkondhesearethiain.The,learningofmyplahemwiththemostdashiiduhelessIwentdowntotheshoppierwhichistwoblowhereIlive;thereIhadnoticedforseveralmonths,andwithoutthinkinghowtheycouldpertaintome,acoupleairswindowsofabuildingthathstoreayparlor.AsIweairsIhadafeelingofpleteuy;surelyrentinglicatedbusihecaseofoffices;youdidnotsimplyknothedoorofthevatpremisesandwaittobeadmitted;itwouldhavetobedhels.Also,theywouldwanttoomuey.
...
[10]TheroomasevidentlyabinationlivingroomahefirstthingsInoticedweremodelsofships—galleons,clippers,QueenMarys—sittiables,thewindowsills,thetelevisioherewerenoshipstherewerepottedplantsandaclutterofwhataresometimescalled“masents—a,deerheads,breashtraysofheavy,veined,shihewallshotographsandwhatmighthavebeendiplomas.Ooshooodleandabulldog,dressedinmasdfemihing,andassumingwithdismalembarrassmentaposeofaffe.Writtenacrossitwas“OldFriends”
.Buttheroomwasreallydominatedbyaportrait,withitsownlightandagildedframe;itwasofagood-looking,fair-hairedmanitingbehindadesk,wearingabusiandlookilyprosperous,rosyandagreeable.Hereagain,itisprobablyhindsightonmypartthatpointsoutthatithereisevidentalsosomeuneasiness,somelackoffaiththemanhasinthisrole,ateospreadhimselftoobountifullyaly,whichforallanyoneknowsmayleadtodisaster.
[11]heMalleys.AssoonasIsawthatoffitedit.ItwaslargerthanIneeded,beingdividedinsuchawaythatitwouldbesuitableforadoctor’soffice.(raherebutheleft,saysMrs.Malleyifulbutunihewallsweredbare,whitewithalittlegraytocuttheglarefortheeyes.Siherewerenodoevidenorhadbeen,asMrs.Malleyfreelytoldme,forsometime,Iofferedtwenty-fivedollarsamonth.Shesaidsheeaktoherhusband.
[12]TheimeIcamemyreedupon,aMr.Malleyintheflesh.Iexplained,asIhadalreadydoohiswife,thatIdidnotwanttomakeuseofmyularbusinesshours,butduringtheweekendsaimesintheeveniIwoulduseitfor,andItoldhim,notwithfirstwhetherIoughttosayIdidstenography.
[13]Heabsorbedtheinformationwithgoodhumor.“Ah,you’reawriter.”
[14]“Wellyes.Iwrite.”
[15]“Thenwe’lldoourbesttoseeyou’refortablehere,”
hesaidexpansively.“I’magreatmanforhobbiesmyself.Alltheseshipmodels—Idothemihey’reablessingforthenerves.Peopleneedanofortheirnerves.Idaresayyou’rethesame.”
[16]“Somethingthesame,”
Isaid,resolutelyagreeable,evehesawmybehaviorinthishazyalight.Atleasthedidnotaskme,asIhalfexpected,whowaslookihe,anddidmyhusbaenyears,maybefifteeened,spread,ahemaure.Hishipsandthighshadnacoffat,ghimtomovewithasigh,aysettlingofflesh,aporiarfort.Hishairandeyeshadfaded,hisfeaturesblurred,andtheaffable,predatoryexpressionhadcollapsediroublinghumilityandistrust.IdidnotlookathiIhadakingaakeontheresponsibilityofknowinganymorehumanbeings.
[17]Ontheweekehoutthehelpofmyfamily,whowouldhavebeenkind.Ibroughtmytypewriterandacardtableandchair,alsoalittlewoodentableonwhichIsetahotplate,akettle,ajarofinstantcoffee,spoon,andayellowmug.Thatwasall.Ibroodedwithsatisfathebarenessofmywalls,theityofmyessentialfurnishings,theremarkablelagstodust,olish.
[18]ThesightwasoMr.Malley.HeknoydoorsoonafterIwassettledandsaidthathewaoexplaihiuhelightierroom,whichIwouldtheradiatorandhowtoworktheawnihewindow.Helookedarouhingwithgloomandmystifidsaiditwasanawfullyunfortableplaceforalady.
[19]“It’sperfectlyallrightforme,”
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